FAREWELLS

Well hello there!

We're 13 days into the second half of year, how's this half looking for you?

Welcome to today's gist. 

So if you've been following the gist for a while now, I'm sure you could tell how elated I was to be graduating and how I've been sort of on an all time high since I graduated.

This past Sunday, I handed over the last position of responsibility I had in the University and it felt wonderful to do that!

All was good and well until a few minutes later when I sat down and it hit me "this is it." I looked at the faces of people who had come to mean so much to me and I thought "I don't know the next time I'll see most of these people; in fact I'll probably never see some of them again." In that moment I understood the expression "parting is such sweet sorrow" anew. 

When my 'Namey' was leaving, she looked at me and said "bye Namey, see you… omo when would that be sef?" And we both didn't know when the next time we'd see each other would be. This was the first time in the entire time we've known each other that we couldn't say with any modicum of certainty, the next time we would see each other. 

I came home from the event with my friend and as we were parting ways, he said "Achenyo when next would we see?" I told him "Omo ShuGz, e go be oo" because I honestly didn't know when next we would see, it could be anything from one week to months or even decades from now. 

As these events were unfolding and I was having these conversations, it hit me that in all my excitement for graduation, I didn't properly contemplate the fact that I would actually be saying goodbye to a lot of people and things that have been consistently a part of my life for over 6 years. This is especially hard for me because normally, I hate goodbyes, then now I have to say so many goodbyes to so many people without any assurance of when next, if ever, I would get to see them. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm still very glad to have graduated and to be done with University, that fact will never change, it's just now the implications of my graduation that I hadn't properly considered have begun to hit me and in the spirit of honesty, I've shed quite a few tears at the thought of the goodbyes I'm having to say. 

This is not the first time I've had to say these kind of goodbye, it's just this time I'm more understanding of all that the goodbyes I'm saying will mean, for me and for the people I love. 

I know it's easy to say that with Social media, keeping in touch wouldn't be as hard as it was some 20 years ago, and I am so grateful for that, but the switch from seeing certain people with a determined level of assurance to probably seeing them sometime if life let's our paths cross has me reeling, and not in the best of ways. 

As I've contemplated these things, it's become more apparent to me the importance of appreciating wherever one is in their journey of life; as we work towards moving on to the next thing, sometimes we neglect to consider the fact that moving to that next thing means letting go of some things here -I won't be packing the people I love from Jos when I'm leaving now would I? So to move on from here, I have to let go of some things, and people, that have to be here. I'm glad I learnt, albeit late, the importance of the 'here and now' in my journey. 

Another thing I've learned is the importance of community. I remember when I was younger, I hated the expression "no man is an island" especially because I thought I could be that. Since I never put my theory to test, I can't attest to the fact that I could survive on my own and by myself, but I know that there's no way I could have been as blessed as I am now if I wasn't given the gift of community. As I thought about leaving my people, I realized that the only reason I could be so affected is the fact that I have let myself into a community of people who have impacted my life, as I have impacted theirs I hope. These people have been a love note from God to me in my journey through the University; I've laughed with some, fought with some, fought against some, cried with some others, grown with some, been groomed by some, groomed some… basically I have had these people in every corner of my life and I consider myself immensely blessed by God to have the community I now have, I wouldn't trade any of them for the chance to show that I can be an island and I'm so glad God didn't let me walk the path of isolation in the University like I'd planned. 

That being said, saying goodbyes still suck, but I'm comforted by the fact that I have these people in my heart and I can always go back to the cherished memories of the period in time when we did life together. 

I pray we all learn to value every stage of our journey and that we become very interested in investing in community. 

See you next week. 

Love,

Achenyo. 

PS, those your goals for 2023, how far? When last did you visit them?